QFL 1 Movers & Shakers

 

#1 FahQ (4-1, 3-0 division record, beat Queef)

The common assumption when Jamaal Charles went down in Week 2 was that he was taking FahQ’s season down with him, especially given the fact that Reggie Wayne was struggling with the disastrous combo of Kerry Collins and Curtis Painter throwing him the ball. While Charles and Wayne (who has since been waived) had originally combined for $38 of FahQ’s salary, the team had enough depth to withstand their losses and finds itself in the #1 seed. Even better news is that this week silent partner, Jerry, had a baby girl named Grace.

#2 TenQ (3-2, 2-0 division record)

TenQ has by far scored the most points this season (the best indicator of good team management) and has also had the most points scored against them. Seth’s triplets of Brees, McCoy, and Megatron are probably the best QB/RB/WR trio in the QFL and will likely carry TenQ to a division title out of the tough QFL North. The way they’re playing, this team is the odds on favorite five weeks in to make it to the Quince Bowl and defend its title.

#3 Quince United (3-2, 2-0 division record)

Welcome to the party, Hans. Quince United currently stands atop the QFL’s weakest division but how long will it last? History shows that somehow QU will find a way into the losers bracket. Hans has some serious work to do to ensure this doesn’t happen AGAIN. Next up for Hans is his hated QFL nemesis Paul. Beating Queef would be a great way to position himself for a run at winner’s bracket (for a change).

#4 Queef (4-1, 2-1 division record, lost to FahQ)

Defense hoarder Paul came into this season with a strategy of collecting running backs and defenses (deviating from his usually stellar collection of wide receivers). One wonders was the defense strategy more to deny other owners the ability to pick up scrub defenses or was it to wait for any one them to become decent? Anyway Paul finds himself at 4-1 as he gets ready to tangle with former roommate and arch nemesis Rudy for the coveted empty Jim Beam Bottle trophy awarded to the winner of the QFL’s oldest rivalry.

#5 Quince (3-2, 1-1 division record, beat BQP)

There is a direct correllation between Ted’s victories this season and games where Michael Vick and Desean Jackson have BOTH scored double digit points. Even though the number of Eagles players on Ted’s roster is at an all time low (3) he is still tied to the success of his beloved hometown team just as much as the past. Next up is an important division game against QBC that can help Quince separate itself from the pack and stay in contention for the QFL North Division title.

#6 BQP (3-2, 1-1 division record, lost to Quince)

As usual, Adrian Peterson is Shades’ best player. As usual, Peterson is surrounded by mediocre talent. Duggan desperately needs Shonn Green, Matt Ryan, and Santonio Holmes to live up to their preseason hype if he is going to stay in contention in the tough QFL North. Will Tebow be the answer to his prayers? We’ll see but in the meantime Duggan will have to stick with Ryan for one more week in a fierce matchup with current division leader TenQ. A lot is riding on this game for both teams.

#7 Bing Quest (3-2, division record 1-2)

Josh should be in jail for the crimes he just committed against SOQ and DBQ. He was the clear winner in a lopsided three way deal that saw him collect the Steelers backfield AND a first round pick. Anyway, fresh off that steal, BQ couldn’t get it going against FahQ but will look to rebound in a big way this weekend against a hapless DBQ team.

#8 QTang (2-3, division record 1-1, 378 pots scored)

What a season it has been for Benny. First the stunning news about Manning, then his hurt kicker, then a hurt Miles Austin, and now a hurt Andre Johnson. At least he gets Austin back this weekend. While the team is likely headed for another loser’s bracket appearance at this point since these are just too many injuries to overcome, make no mistake – this is a dangerous team capable of knocking anyone off in any given week. Benny has some good pieces in place, and this author is happy he doesn’t have to play Qtang again this season.

#9 SOQ (2-3, division record 1-1, 336 points scored)

Selecting Cam Newton so early in this year’s rookie draft was a genius move that will reverberate for years in the QFL. The only problem for Scott is that the QFL is a fantasy league where you can only play one QB at a time. Deciding between Brady and Newton week in and week out will result in an ulcer by Week 12. One other item to note is that Steven Jackson CONTINUES to kill this team. His inability to stay healthy has hurt Scott for years and has come to fruition again early in this young season already. Scott will have to make some shrewd managerial moves to keep winning but the QFL South is a weak and wide open division so even fourth place DBQ isn’t technically out of contention yet.

#10 QBC (1-4, 1-2 division record, 385 points scored)

Like the long list of recent Superbowl losers, QBC is having a hard time rebounding from losing to TenQ in the Qunce Bowl. The team needs to do a better job of managing its affairs because trading a draft pick to get a kicker because your kicker is on a bye is just plain sloppy. QBC has been competitive because of their defensive play but defense alone in the QFL does not a championship make. Jim and Ian need to buckle down because this season is slipping away already.

#11 DBQ (1-4, 1-2 division record, 325 points scored)

Some might argue that Jay’s season was lost the moment he cut Brees right before the start of this year’s auction and let him walk to Seth for a song. The plan was to rely on last season’s rookie sensation Sam Bradford, but surprisingly the Rams have already fallen apart this season. DBQ got really lucky when out of nowhere Ryan Fitzpatrick started playing like his AFC East rival Tom Terriffic. Unfortunately though Fitz has cooled off considerably the last two weeks and DBQ has struggled mightily. Had Drew Brees on DBQ’s roster in Week 4, Jay would have won and would be 2-3 instead of 1-4 and going nowhere fast. Throw in the disastrous three way trade that sent Pittsburgh’s backfield to Josh and you have yourself one lost season already heading into Week 6.

#12 Original Quincelar (1-4, division record 0-3)

Nobody was hurt more by Chris Johnson’s training camp holdout than Rishi. It took until Week 5 for Johnson to shake the rust off and score his first touchdown of the season. Meanwhile, Rishi has struggled to put together a viable wishbone due to Arian Foster sitting out a couple games with a hamstring and Antonio Gates going through his usual troublesome foot problems. The lone bright spot has been Matt Forte who is running like a man in search of a Chris Johnson paycheck. It makes you wonder though what will happen to Forte’s production once he finally gets it? Anyway, on paper, OQ was the team to beat coming into this season but simply has not lived up to expectations. One thing to note though is that like QTang, once this team gets healthy and starts firing on all cylinders, they are going to be VERY dangerous and you will not want to play them. This writer is not prepared at this time to write OQ off just yet…