Shock: Pandemonium Reigns Under Commissioner Dutchie

Pandemonium Reigns Under Commissioner Dutchie

Things have gone from mildly irritating to downright disturbing under the first eight weeks of Doug’s tenure as der kommissar. Teams have been flagrantly violating the sacred QFL Constitution without little to no talk of fines. When der kommissar does threaten to fine a team, a returned threat of an owner taking his ball and going home is all it takes for Dutch Wonderland to grant a “one-time” exemption (valid for all teams 1st violation).

There have been unconfirmed reports of Tuesday cuts, players started on bye weeks, players started while on IR or confirmed to be inactive (though to be fair, this is no longer a finable offense), while one team even played a 3 RB 2 WR lineup last week.

Is this one repeat offender or an orchestrated Occupy QFL3 effort by supporters of former commissioners K-Rich or J-Rad? No one knows, or really cares all that much. Apathy has also been an issue for the new fathers and world-travelling owners of the thrice. The Commish sent out a scathing 1:00 AM e-mail to the league after Vote Quimby’s devious owners were able to snatch Jamaal Charles and Peyton Manning off the Free Agency pile for a mere $1 bid:

“Being commish sucks. Ive been dealing with all this bullshit and Wise gets to pick up Charles and fucking Peyton for a fucking dollar.

Michaels, why the fuck are you starting players on a bye last week?”

And subsequent missive

“ALSO, how the fuck can no one else bid on Charles? What the fuck is wrong with you people. You let Wise pick him up for a fucking dollar?!

I’m fining both myself and Wise for shady dealings. $40 each. I don’t want there to be any illusion of a backroom deal. So that fine should put an end to that.”

Will D-Ver’s first season at the helm be the last season for QFL3? Stay tuned….